Best Of October 2016

1. 
   Sunny Saves Bo From Mountain Lion During Cross-Country Journey To Reunite With Obamas

   
2. 
   National Association Of Enablers To Americans: ‘C’mon’

   
3. 
   Report: Friend Has Been Going By Middle Name This Whole Fucking Time

   
4. 
   FEC Extends Election By 7 Months To Give Nation Chance To Better Get To Know Candidates

   
5. 
   Ex-Boyfriend Just Thought He’d Check In And Throw Entire Day Off

   

1. 
   Secret Service Shuts Down Biden’s Unofficial White House Tour Operation

   
2. 
   Anderson Cooper Begins Debate By Giving Trump Opportunity To Explain What The Fuck Is Wrong With Him

   
3. 
   Trump Complains Entire Personality Rigged Against Him

   
4. 
   Intergalactic Law Enforcement Officers Place Energy Shackles On Hillary Clinton

   
5. 
   Body Given False Hope With First Piece Of Fruit In 9 Days

   

1. 
   Area Man A Staunch Single-Gender Voter

   
2. 
   Wall Street Executive Telling Friend How Amazing It Is To See Clinton Live